38. Minglish

Well, I have this habit of switching languages during a conversation. One sentence will be in English, the other in hindi, the next in telugu and the very next in the hyderabadi ‘kaiku’ slang lang. I can’t help it, it’s become a habit. I’ve grown up in an extremely cosmopolitan surrounding and this lang-switch is one of the prominent observed side-effects. A college friend of mine (a purist in many ways), once heard me have a multi-lango conversation with my brother on the phone and was astonished to say the least. “You never stuck to one single language. You kept changing it every sentence. Your bro must be having a tough time understanding whatever u had to say. Wait till I tell this to everyone in the group, they’ll pull your leg till you leave college” (which they apparently did, but its only now when I’ve left college that I realize how much I miss the fun of all those leg-pulling sessions).

Anyways, I’ve come to observe another very prevalent speaking pattern amongst different age groups, which is much more harmful and harder to understand when compared to my multi-lango syndrome. It’s the use of ‘Minglish’. Well, this is a term I’ve coined, and its gonna take some time defining it completely. But here’s a short description of what Minglish is. You see, there are some ppl who involuntarily think in regional languages(mostly their mother tongues) and translate their thought out in English while speaking. Now the problem is that not many of them take the trouble to semantically transform the thought into English before giving it out, they just take the thought in the regional language, replace each word with the closest possible match in English and then blurt it out. The result is a hotch-potch lingo which gets very hard to digest for any purist or a lover of the language. Some use it because they feel speaking in English enhances their position in a group (I call them bloody dumb fuck wannabes). There are others who are forced to speak English as a part of protocol( in offices, schools etc – my sympathies with them). And there are these others who just speak English for the heck of it. People of all ages are using Minglish inadvertently. I hear it wherever I go. It’s hilarious most of times.

Let me give you a few examples of Minglish and how prevalent it is (in hyd atleast) -->

- Was on my way to a temple in a bus when I observed two college going guys talking to each other.
First guy : hey, when does the matinee show in Tivoli theater start ?
Second guy : Now only rey !! We’ll have to go quickly. ( the thought : In hindi – ‘abb heeech shuru hora rey’)

- Was in a restaurant, was waiting for my order to be served. It had already been a half an hour and I was getting impatient. I called the waiter and said -
Me : Excuse me. Have you forgotten my order.
Waiter : No saaaaab. For such a biiiig order, it takes some time no. If you cant wait for that much time also, then what I can do, tell me! ( the thought : In hindi – “nahin sahib. Bade order ke liye thoda waqt lagtha naa. Uthna bhi sabar nahin kar sakthe aap toh main kya kar saktha hoon aap hi boliye !” )

- A 22+ female who has just reached the US writes this scrap to her brother who is back here in India. – “Hey bro, take my number. It is 0091-xxxx…. And I tried so much to call your phone. You dint pick up only!!!”. ( the thought : In hindi – “kitna try kiya, tumne uthaaya hi nahin !” )

- Was dropping my cousin sister off to school (she’s a fourth grader) when we had this small conversation.
Me : Hey, look at that girl there. You should have long hair like her.
Sis : Whyyyyie ?? My hair is not big aaaa ? (the word she thought in her thought : telugu word – ‘kadha’ or the tamil word – ‘illaya’ )

- The movie ‘The Angrez’ has this character called lakshmi who talks pure Minglish. Here’s one of her dialogues.
Lakshmi : “Arey smitha, don’t go even near those NRI boys. When I went to their room no, they were doing something something!” ( the thought : In telugu – “arey smitha, aa NRI poragalla deggara kuda vellaku. Valla room ki vellanu kadha, appudu vallu yememoo chestunnaru !” or as we popularly say in hyd – “woh logaan kya kya ki kar rahe the udhar !!” )

- Me and my frens from college use the ‘–off ’ language a lot.
Come off rey ! (the thought : In hindi – “aaja rey” ) - the word ‘off’ is used just to fill the blank space in the thought.
Lets smoke some fags off rey!
Is that switch on? Off it off rey!

- I call my bro up to tell him to tell mom that I’d be watching a movie and eating outside in the night. He responds in this way - “Arey kaka. Don’t do langa works like this. Come home straight !!”. ( the thought : In telugu – “arey kaka, ilaanti langa panulu emi cheyyaku. seedha intiki raa” )

- A school teacher, while checking homework books said this. “hey boy. Quickly, open your this one and show me your that one !!!”. (the intention – “open your bag and show me your homework book” :D )

- A telugu movie called “Aaha” has this sequence where Chandra Mohan talks to a deaf old chap during a death ceremony.
Old guy : do you know how she died ?
Ch Mhn : ya, she died of heart attack it seems. ( the thought : In telugu – “heart attack vachhi poyindhi anta” )
Old guy (hasnt heard the previous sentence) : There must be some reason for such a sudden death. Do you know the reason ?
ChMhn : ‘That reason only’ i am trying to tell you sir!!! ( the thought : In telugu – “adhe reason cheppadaaniki prayathnam chestunna sir” )

A new dictionary needs to come out with well defined meanings for the “now only”s,“that only”s, “come off”s,“this one”s and “that one”s. I, myself might have used some Minglish while writing this post, if I have, please do forgive me. I do tend to get a bit involved while writing. After all, even writing is a translation of thought into form, and it isn’t always that we think in English, do we ;)