Wednesday, January 31, 2007

31. A brush with the supernatural

Why in the hell is the male being so numbskullishly eager to get noticed by the cute female, who is in the next cubicle of the 3rd AC compartment (of the Lok shakti express) ? I mean, what does he expect ? that she’ll turn towards him, give a rising smile (may be even wink) and follow it up with a “Hi handsome ! lets go out on a date sometime.” :P
The male hears a voice out of nowhere, looks in the direction from where he hears the voice, but doesn’t find anyone. He’s kinda puzzled, then he’s told by the voice to just look up and listen, so he does that obediently. The voice begins it’s narrative:
“ Don’t u ever forget that cute girls can never fall in love at first sight with ppl who have a waist line of 38 and an eyesight of –0.25 in both the eye balls!
Don’t u ever forget that u are a tamil Brahmin, that u are gonna have an arranged marriage with a female of preferably the same sub-sub-sub sect !
And how did u forget that u’re this huuuuge miser who tries to bargain even in brand showrooms like reebok, u haven’t even bought any clothes for urself in the last 3 years.So, how in the hell will u get the willingness to spend money in such a free flowing way.
Also, should’nt u be considering the fact that even if u get smitten by the gal and somehow do get the urge to splurge, that u don’t have any cash, tht u’re dead broke !
Lets hypothetically consider that despite all this, she does agree to go out on a date with u; how are u gonna pick her up from her place? have u forgotten that despite staying in a city like hyderabad for 21 years, u haven’t learnt how to drive !!! ”
The male interrupts…. “Enuf enuf enuf ! Yes, I guess I am a misfit for the cute female category,but should’nt I have a minute chance, considering that ‘love is blind’!”
“My dear, love may be blind, but it definitely is’nt mentally or physically challenged ok ! So wipe out such possibilities, spread the bedsheet on your side-upper berth and goto sleep.”
Alas ! the luckless male rests in peace, rather in pieces (heartbroken :( )