Been a long time since I've boarded a train. Close to 3 years now. That's quite a long while. Train travel and the middle-class Indian cannot be kept apart for a long time. It is an integral part of the Indian middle-class existence. Every train journey brings with it a set of mixed emotions - a sense of anticipation, a hunger pang, an urge to move on, a self-enquiry of the road not taken, a weird pseudo-nostalgic queasy feel overall.
I have had my fair share of interesting train journeys. Some more memorable than others. Here is a brief account of one of the more interesting ones.
The only 'male' in the 8 seat compartment
Being the only 'male' in a compartment ideally should be a cause of joy, simply because you would expect at least one of the remaining 7 women in the cube to be in and around your age group, in which case you would have a paisa-vasool journey. However, that assumption went for a toss when I found myself in a cubicle full of eunuchs/hijras. They had the other 7 berths in the compartment (by reservation, not force). And it was a 24 hour journey. Imagine. No, you can't. Unless you've been through the exact same ordeal, which I hope you have not, for your own sake.
The only eunuchs I'd seen until then(in my entire life) were the ones that did the 'clap and beg' routine in the trains and the ones that would miraculously appear outside every home where a function of some sort was underway. I'd seen them being very persuasive and coercive (until they got what they wanted). The stories I'd heard were scarier. With all these negative thoughts buzzing through my tiny brain, was needless to say that I was petrified.
For the first hour or so, I don't think I looked at anything but my shoes. Raising eyes unto eye-level meant eye contact. And eye contact meant certain doom. Was afraid that eye contact could be misinterpreted - my fear could be interpreted as hate/disgust/aversion.The only consolation was that I had a 'Side Lower' berth. This gave me some room to walk up and down the corridor umpteen times without rhyme or reason. But there was nowhere to run or hide. This was a train. That was my berth. No matter what, I had to go back there and make peace with my demons.
I was afraid of the multitude of ways in which I could unintentionally offend them and earn their wrath in the process. I was trying to convince myself to keep conversation to a minimum and strictly use gender-neutral grammar if and when required. My excess luggage was not helping matters. Excess luggage meant space negotiation. Negotiation meant conversation. Staring out through the window was straining my neck like crazy. I was counting the hours down. Time was not exactly 'flying' when I needed it to. Eventually, I became less nervous and adjusted to the situation which was not as big an ordeal as it had appeared to be at first.
In their defense, they were doing their own thing all through the journey, didn't bother me in anyway. One guy from the next compartment came over and started chatting up with them. Gathered from their conversations that they belong to a self-help group for their kind. That they worship their own guru and work in co-operative societies. Although these conversations served as a much needed distraction, they did not do much to bring down the paranoia levels. I was on high-alert mode all through and relaxed only when I saw the yellow board with the destination station's name on it. In retrospect, I could have been a little less paranoid and a bit more confident I suppose. I would've still been as circumspect and cautious however.
Intend to add more train journey accounts to this post. Hope I stick to my plans.
Cheers.
