54. Hey teachers! leave them kids alone!

This is the worst class that I have ever taught !
This is the n'th time that I am scolding your class and I feel very bad everytime do it.
This should be the last time that I scold your class for being noisy and indisciplined !
Please be a little serious in the class !
I will not get affected if some of you do not listen to my lecture. It is you who will suffer. It is your career at stake !
This is the most indisciplined bunch of students that I have ever taught !

Are they kidding us ? Do they still believe that this works. Telling us that we're the worst class is like the oldest trick in the book. Come on teachers and professors. Cant you come up with something more innovative. Just updating the curriculum and the courses which you forcibly spoon feed to us hapless students is not enough. Come up with a better way to hold the attention of the class. Its only coz of your inability to hold our attention in the conventional way that you people take to using these kinds of dialogues which have 'emotional blackmail' written all over their faces. If I really was so consistently indisciplined right from kindergarten till my post-graduation, I surely would have become a criminal somewhere down the line. The very fact that I've reached a post-grad college proves otherwise. So why? Why is it that you people are hell bent upon labelling me and a bunch of my peers as indisciplined, worthless, ignorant imbeciles.

I protest !
We don't need no education
We dont need no thought control
No dark sarcasm in the classroom
Teachers leave them kids alone
Hey! Teachers! Leave them kids alone!
All in all you're just another brick in the wall.

53. Snakey - The blue enigma.,

'Dasavataram' is a real life story inspired by Snakey's avatars. His avatars are as follows.
1) German sniper M. (an 18th century assasin)
2) Nai'X (50 B.C Greek mythological God who fought the Shadow fiend)
3) Mojo (Mojo is rising.)
4) Rimbaud like Snakey (26th century poet)
5) CoLdbLood (Vachesthunnaru vachesthunnaru vachesthunnaru....)
6) lavanyA. (Snakey loves himself so much that he reincarnated in the female form and married himself)
7) Jew (A 1930's snake charmer who danced with the angels to celebrate the holocaust)
8) S4 (Surrealist Snakey's Secret Society 's founder and the only member)
9) Tyler Durden (Snakey's alter ego)
10) Phani Shashank (Jack's broken dream)

- Snakey lives in parallel universes traversing through alternate timelines.

- Snakey has one girlfriend in every continent of the world, per universe.

- Snakey believes that sporting 'kaajal' on his eyelashes will give him a good score on the Counter-Strike(CS) server.

- Snakey always updates his 'about me' the moment he wakes up from his sleep, and he sleeps three times a day.

- When Snakey uploads a photo in his album, it gets blurred automatically.

- Snakey has been molested more number of times than anyone else, except Rahul Sharma.

- Snakey once laugh-farted continously for 5 minutes. Now a laugh-fart is a combo of human body responses where air gets exhorted from one's mouth first and from the ass thereafter, with each response sounding more like the other.

- Snakey ate a Frankie with Prankie in front of a monkey.

- Snakey can transform into a night-stalker just by wearing a 2K rupee night-pant, even during the day.

- Snakey once shared a 'Macaroni Marlboro' with the Naix after THEIR victory over the blood-thirsty cannibals under the pyramids of Mount Olympia.

- Snakey thought he could reach the 'Red oblivion' by dyeing his hair(only his sidelocks) red.

- If every sentence of yours ends with 'man', you are allowed to sleep on or below Snakey's bed.

- In every typed message of yours, only if commas and full stops exceeds the number of words, will it appear on Snakey's scrapbook.

- Snakey is spelt as S.hNa.KeY, (dont forget the space after the comma).

- Snakey loves Ingrid Bergman.

- Snakey discusses Existentialism and Objectivism at bed time with the 'man' and the dog who sleep under his bed.

- Snakey's poems are more encrypted than a regular SSL secure connection.

- Google crashed when Snakey searched for "M. + GerMAny + SArtRe + surreaLism + shlokie".

This is a joint effort from me and Potu. Please comment :)

52. An outburst

Alrite.Am gonna sound a bit patronizing but since this is an 'outburst' post, I dont care. People tell us that we need to have goals, ambitions and aspirations. Look at what you want to be, say 5 years from now or 10 years from now. Then model your way of thinking to attain that goal. They go to the extent of telling that a goal-less man/woman is bound to fail in life. He/She will definitely go wayward. And when i be honest and tell them that I really dont have any such ambition till now, they go ahead and tell me that i need to be responsible and take stock of my life.

Isn't this bullshit fed into our minds from day 1, from the day we learnt to understand what a human mouth could convey. All I wanna ask you people is, do you know what's going to happen tomorrow ? or the day after ? No, you dont. Then do you know what's gonna happen to YOU tomorrow, or the day after ? Do you even bloody realise that death is the only truth in life ! And you people are conveniently avoiding to face it day in and day out, building dreams and what not. You may not exist for long. You may become impotent or go blind or win a whore-house in a lottery or die due to constipation. Anything's possible. Then how is it that you can be so sure of being an investment banker or a CEO of a company in 10 years from now? Ok, if you arent so sure of that, you atleast seem pretty sure that you will be living until then. What gives you that confidence? And what audacity you have to come tell me or anyone else that if I dont have a long term goal, I will suffer in life, struggle in life !

Life's one big journey people. You never know when it'll end. All you know is that you've got the chance to live this moment and so go ahead and live it, embrace it, enjoy it. In this way, when life does end, you dont look back at it and say that I was running all along the journey and never had time to stop at the pitstops and look at the world around. Dont compromise on the present for the future, coz you never know if you do have one. And if you really dont have an ambition as of now and people are forcing you to get one, show them the midde finger and move on. Or better yet, laugh at their ignorance.

51. The Open tap

I see the public tap left open when i walk on the road which leads to my place. I realise that illiterate people may not understand the complete picture, that they may not posess the comprehendable capacity to know the implications of their actions or rather inactions. Water is getting wasted. I go close the tap and walk along.

I stop at an Irani cafe for some chai and biscuits. I goto wash my hands and the washroom tap is half open. I just close it and leave the cafe.

(Sometime back)

I used to stay at a PG (paying guest) accomodation where we people (all 22-25 year old software professionals) had to make do with common bathrooms and a common TV. I used to see the washroom tap being left open from time to time. Educated people these guys were. They were a young, responsible part of the corporate world, doing hi-fi techie work and earning a lot of money. Then how could they not understand the profoundity of the impact of the plunder of this natural resource we call water. I used to shrug and then go close the tap.

I used to work in a software firm, where ach employee having a certain degree of civility and awareness is paramount. The taps in the washrooms would be left open. Now here were not just well educated but highly experienced people. People who had seen a lot in life, had 'experience' in every sense of the word. And yet this apathy. Why ? I used to ask myself the same question so many times. Why ? And never was there an effort from the organization's side to create awareness about the wastage of sucha precious resource. Yes, there used to messages hung near the urinals asking us to pee on target and not to go haywire. But never a conscious attempt to spread the 'conserve water' message.

I have shifted base now. Have quit the software firm and have joined a b-school. The place is filled with ambitious people in their mid and late twenties. People who wanna learn about business, get into high profile jobs and earn obscene amounts of money. Also, there are faculty/professors who have innumerable qualifications; qualifications which any average individual would take five life-times to obtain. But here again, be it the canteen, be it the library, be it the faculty block or be it the mess, I see that the water taps are left open time and again.

Its apalling. Now I am sure of one thing. Being aware of your surroundings and being sensitive to it is not dependant on one's level of education or intellect. But now, that complicates the problem even further. If education cant create awareness in the right sense of the word, then what can? How is it possible for ppl to realise their ecological footprint can and should be minimised. Just give it a thought.